why?

Why can't i sleep
when i stay up and stare at this
mindless screen.
why cant i breathe
when im gulping for air
at the bottom of this cloudy ravine.
why cant i listen
to the cries of lonely ones and i
cant sleep cuz i hear them repeating in my head.
why cant i fall
when im teetering at the edge
of the ravine that holds and swallows the dead.
why cant i cry
when the time seems just right
and all of my pride seems at its end.
why cant i stop
when im going round in circles
trying to find where the golden trail ascends.
why cant i look
when theres such beauty around me
and all that it needs is attention.