Imperfection

What I've come to realize these past few months, as my high school life dwindles, is that i am a very imperfect human being. and though ive said this numerous times to myself and others, i never really had the full understanding of this concept until recently. and the road to realization has been rocky.

Imperfection is not something to be scowled at, though i, by no means, am accepting of this all the time. and its tough to realize that you, and everyone else around you, are not perfect. i think this concept has been drilled into the minds of young people: that all should desire this perfection. and of course, one should always strive to be better, but not to the extent that it hurts oneself and those around him/her.

i know people who scorn others for traits they have no control over. people are slandered, disrespected, spit on, cursed at, shouted at, lied about, lied to, gossiped about, and other useless insults. ive seen so much hate in this high school; almost too much to handle. and sometimes i get so frustrated by it all, because i sometimes find myself caught in that trap as well, especially by the fact that there's really nothing i can do about it. and i want to do something. i want to make people see that to be what they want to be, they don't have to put others down. and it hurts me so much to see students judged on a daily basis by those who have no ability or right to judge anything in the first place.

i dont understand, and hardly have the capacity to. i trust in god, and there's not much more i can do. im learning how to do this all the time, and these past couple days, i've been so happy. the joy god gives me in inexplicable. and ive realized, that i dont have to explain it. i dont have to listen to what the rest of the world says, and i dont have to be like them. its taken me awhile, but im finally finding my way. and i wish that for all others as well.